Friday, October 9, 2009

Less Than 10 Minute Matinee # 5

THE FUTURIST! brings you a special SHOCKtober Less Than 10 Minute Matinee! Yes ... spine tingling previews of a scare show featuring THE VAMPIRE'S COFFIN and THE ROBOT VS THE AZTEC MUMMY. Only the best in SHOCK ATTRACTIONS direct from Mexico! And these South of the Border Classics are brought to you in HYPNOSCOPE! One time THE FUTURIST! experienced Hypnoscope and later found himself waking up alone, in his shirt, tie, suit coat and boxer shorts, in a vacant lot next to an H & R Block Tax Office in Utter Despair, N.J. Oh ... and he was handcuffed and wearing a cat mask.

Getting scared at the movies can "amp" up the hunger factor in that gut of yours ... so, calm it down with some delicious, oh so tasty cardboard pizza soaked in sauce with some kind of odd cheese spread on top. Is that dog food sprinkled on there? Good Pagan God, that's scary pizza.

And now our feature attraction. Modern science is used by evil fiends, including a Middle Eastern looking Dracula, to revive the Frankenstein Monster, who appears to be covered in that refreshment stand pizza cheese. Be prepared for bad editing, bad acting and boredom.

directed by Al Adamson


christian said...

I'd still eat that pizza....

Dara said...

Does he say " heighten the horror, shock your senses, kill your brain!" in the first one? Why would you want to kill your brain?!

Also, that Dracula looks like Sacha Baron Cohen.


THE FUTURIST! is scared of that pizza. THE FUTURIST! actually saw DRACULA VS FRANKENSTEIN double with a Paul Naschy werewolf picture one Saturday afternoon. They were terrible. So, so numbing to the brain.