Friday, July 3, 2009

Before the 4th


The always joyful and happy to assist Sabrina Delacourt works the counter at SATAN'S ASHTRAY: YOUR FRIENDLY FIREWORKS EMPORIUM; located over the border in nearby Pennsylvania. She loves to see haiku and his pals, from the band Marcel Proust's Mustache, when they come by every late June for Roman Candles and other explosives. They bring her candy and she gives them a nice discount.

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This year, Fleming Clamdish has acquired THE BUMBLEBEE 4000 ...a top of the line explosive for the holiday festivities. haiku is currently digging a trench for this baby! A call has been put into Newark and Teterboro Airports to halt all flights over Utter Despair after dusk on the 4th. Yowza!!

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And here's to the boys in the UTTER DESPAIR VOLUNTEER FIRE COMPANY No. 3. Tomorrow is one of their busiest days. Chief Grinder and his staff are always on the spot to extinguish all blazes whose origins stem from stray fireworks and such. They are equipped with the best in firefighting tools and fantastic cheap booze.

Happy 4th from THE FUTURIST! !!

3 comments:

Mike said...

And don't forget to go see The Amazing Frollo!* and his Dangerously Apathetic Explosion Show TOMORROW, as part of his exclusive lying down engagement in the Jungle Room at the Utter Despair Holiday Inn, just off the Turnpike. Free balloons for the kids (must inflate them yourself).

*Exclamation point provided by THE FUTURIST!

Dara said...

"UTTER DESPAIR VOLUNTEER FIRE COMPANY"?

What's the point?

THE FUTURIST! said...

Mike:

How could one forget that headliner at the Explosion Show?

Dara:

That is a GOOD ONE!!
HAHAHA!! Very good!