THE FUTURIST! received this Vincent Van Gogh Action Figure as a late holiday gift from Aunt Vespa. It came by Postal Messenger with a return address stating that it originated in Amsterdam. Aunt Vespa must be haunting the canals of Holland, eating Edam Cheese and, perhaps, smelling tulips. She does love botany. As you can see, the action figure comes with an easel, several miniature faux masterpieces depicting different states of clinically diagnosed depression in his boldly colored visual style. Van Gogh's head can be detached for different states of hirsute appearance. Of course, his ear is detachable, too ... it was mislaid earlier this morning and somehow appeared in THE FUTURIST!'s bowl of Turkey Broth and Orzo Pasta; thankfully it was not masticated or digested.
A big plus was that the figure came with a beautifully designed replica of the shabby small living quarters of Van Gogh. THE FUTURIST! can recreate the artist's miserable life of delusion and sadness; complete with sweat stained bedsheets, paint spattered floor and curtains and small plastic bottles of wine to be inserted into his plastic hands. This delightful figure can play act different states of drunkenness. Small chairs, a table and teeny weeny vases and plates can be tossed about in a weeping blinding psychotic rage, while THE FUTURIST! replicates sound effects of Van Gogh's woe. "Aaaargh! I HATE MYSELF!!! No one loves me!! My world is crumbling about me! I WANT TO DIIIIIEEE!!!!"
Hopefully, haiku will not walk in on this scene of emotional transference.