THE YOUNG FUTURIST!'s Christmas Wish List

A Picture Can Say a 1,000 Lies

THE TEEN FUTURIST! ?

THE FUTURIST! hasn't had a good week. There has been some problems with his "work", some dental pain, holiday and birthday parties of pure melancholy and gastro-intestinal distress and now .... blackmail!

IT seems someone has threatened to "internet expose" a photo they claim to be THE TEEN FUTURIST! How distressing. In order to destroy their evil joy in making people believe they are so clever, THE FUTURIST! is posting the above photo (which was sent to him via email). THE FUTURIST! will not corroborate that this is or is NOT a photo of THE TEEN FUTURIST!, but will let you decide ... and let this dastardly blackmailer spin in frustration over being foiled in having his fun.

But, if that IS he pictured above ... well, he certainly had good hair.

Saturday Matinee Understudy

Attention Theater Goers

holding tickets for Saturday's Matinee

Performance of

THE ICE CREAM MAN COMETH

The Part of

THE YOUNG FUTURIST!

will be played

by Randy Shelly

Thank You!

Bears Scare THE FUTURIST!

This supposed photographic evidence MIGHT indicate why THE FUTURIST! has a fear of bears to this very day. At a birthday party for THE YOUNG FUTURIST! held a very long time ago, which was held in a relative's backyard, Uncle Gary thought that renting a small black bear was a brilliant idea. You might expect an adult to hire Shetland pony for the afternoon for the children to ride, but Uncle Gary knew a carnival owner that was traveling through the area and made arrangements to meet him at a nearby saloon for contract negotiations. After several cocktails, Uncle Gary was assured that the young bear, named Toodles, would dance to music and juggle balls. This did occur to some extent ... Toodles arrived and danced on top of THE YOUNG FUTURIST! and did juggle balls ... but balls that physically belonged to THE YOUNG FUTURIST! THE FUTURIST! has never forgotten this pre-pubescent outdoor Birthday celebraton and it has inspired him to create this poster in FUTURA FONT:

The Invisible Man Seen?

THE FUTURIST! tried out his acting chops in his younger years at Henrik Ibsen High School in Utter Despair, N.J.. Being insecure and terribly neurotic, however, he decided, after being asked by his good friend Howard Reckson (director of the Talent Show) to perform and contribute writing to the show, to perform something that would help him hide from the audience. His decision, also, provided him an "armor" of sorts against his stage fright. He performed this moment from James Whale's THE INVISIBLE MAN completely swathed in bandages and sported a dashing smoking jacket and white gloves. In a rather distressing choice of supporting casting, the fiancee Flora was portrayed by a thin girlishly attractive 17 year old Charles Bender in female drag. Charles was still trying to find himself ... and THE FUTURIST! hopes he did, by now.



In the spirit of SHOCKtober and the mention of Henrik Ibsen High School, this photo has come to THE FUTURIST!'s attention recently. Could this be THE YOUNG FUTURIST! at age 17 sporting a hideous gold sport coat and polyester blue and gold necktie? And look at that scary poised robotic head tilting applied by a moustached oily Board of Education paid photographer! And that smile ... hiding pure utter despair.

8mm Monster Memories

So many memories as THE YOUNG FUTURIST! regarding monsters ... oh so many. One memory that was recently brought back was the discovery of a shoe box in back of a closet. The box contained, amongst other forgotten objects, several small cardboard boxes from Castle Films. THE YOUNG FUTURIST!'s father had an 8mm projector and Castle Films produced these little tiny reels of abridged Universal horror classics. They would take THE WOLFMAN, DRACULA or ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN and cut them down to 8 minute movies; excising most of the story but still creating a fast paced idea of the original film ... little plot and all the action. THE YOUNG FUTURIST! has in his possession this particular film below. It is one of the many repetitious Lon Chaney Jr. Mummy movies .. in this case, THE MUMMY'S TOMB.



... and more kid 8mm monster mayhem ... here's a compilation of creative attempts of movie madness by kids inspired by monsters. THE YOUNG FUTURIST! had an 8mm camera, too. However, after filming his two reel epic about a detective who steals robbery money from a deserted hotel hide-away and suffers the wrath of the dead zombie robbers, he realized, after it was developed at The Utter Despair Pharmacy, that he had left the lens cap on. The pain of Life started very very early for THE FUTURIST!.

Saturday Music Brought Back from the Past

In his public school days, when he was THE YOUNG FUTURIST!, THE FUTURIST! did some work for a theater group at Henrik Ibsen High School. He sat in on many rehearsals and auditions and enjoyed seeing the process of creating a stage play. One time, THE FUTURIST! watched Laurel Standish perform the song presented below as part of her audition. Young 17 yr old Laurel Standish sang with pitch perfect perfection as the accompanying piano, guitar and drums added to her melodious voice. After the song began, Laurel seemed to direct the song to THE YOUNG FUTURIST!. He felt every word hit him directly as if his soul was a row of sheet metal ducks being "pinged" by a BB gun at the town carnival. Was Laurel Standish singing to the inner melancholy of THE YOUNG FUTURIST! Well, he is not sure, but he will never forget this sappy 70s song, the tingle running across his skin as Laurel Standish sang, or her sparkling Crayola colored Caribbean Current Blue eyes.

Listen:


HAVE YOU NEVER BEEN MELLOW?
performed by Olivia Newton-John

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

** THE (YOUNG) FUTURIST!: age 9 **

Ah, THE FUTURIST! loves photographs
from his family album.
Memories of happy youth!