Monday, December 27, 2010

Ice Station Utter Despair

THE FUTURIST!'s backyard the night of 12/26/10
Expecting blizzard to intensify.
In the background you can see the searchlight
of a neighboring secret government internment compound
disguised as a normal looking suburban New Jersey home.
Someone escaped during the wintry deluge.

The next morning.
Same scene after end of blizzard.
It was so quiet.
THE FUTURIST! had to go out to clean up.
The winds were blasting at 50 mph.
Drifts were quite high.
The back door was covered in snow.
THE FUTURIST! had to get out through an upstairs window.
The huge drifts cushioned his fall.
No one was hurt.

This is THE FUTURIST!'s car.
Through the miracle of brutal Mother Nature's grace,
the back of the car was spared any cover of snow.
However, the front was a bitch to uncover.

Evidence of the depth of Winter's cruelty.
Actual trudging indentations
of THE FUTURIST!'s boot clad feet
are pictured for your awe.

This photo shows the length of THE FUTURIST!'s driveway.
It is a horrific 80 feet long macadam landing/launching
pad for his modest economy automobile.
Please peruse the snow wall in front of garage.
It was terrifying.
Neighbor child believed that those foot prints
were from a Tauntaun which is a species
of omnivorous reptomammals who were
indigenous to the ice planet Hoth in STAR WARS.
*direct definition from

Using a household carpentry ruler,
THE FUTURIST! was able to ascertain that
the snowfall was 22 inches in depth.
He later went into the house and passed out
due to over exertion from snow removal.
He is currently easing the pain in his back
with a champagne ice bucket.


Anonymous said...

Quite an ordeal! Part of me hopes for this kind of blizzard to hit my area, just to see what it's like. Also, I live in an apartment building, which means the snow clearance is not my department. Bet homeownership doesn't seem that great now. Suck on that, America.

Dara said...

Wow, that seems quite sudden! We got very heavy snow in Edinburgh, but not in the form of a blizzard. That's mad. Thanks for sharing!



You won't like it if this occurs when you need to commute to your job. You will have to stay in your apartment and eat canned tuna fish and Wonder bread.


It was a blizzard. All overnight, well part of Sunday, too. It started at 11 am and went on until 6 am Monday morning. The winds were horrifying.