haiku is planning a 4th of July outdoor grilling event this coming weekend. He's very excited about this get together; his friends in the unknown indie band that is going nowhere, Marcel Proust's Mustache, will be attending. There is talk of illegal explosive devices that will cause brightly colored aerial designs of a patriotic flavor. Of course, there will be hot dogs, hamburgers and some kind of skewered vegetable kebabs. The most exciting thing, it seems, is that he purchased this new contraption to inject condiments (mustard or ketchup) onto the aforementioned food offerings. He believes it will cause quite a sensation. THE FUTURIST! wonders if it comes with a holster. He, also, can think of a very funny visual gag involving this gun, ketchup and the posed aftermath of a "fake" suicide attempt. Oh, that could be fun right before the corn on the cob.