Tuesday, February 17, 2009


Pumpkinhead Doyle, Attractive Indian Girl
and Gawky Flash-in-the-Pan Patel accepting one of the
145 awards for Slumdog Millionaire

haiku really doesn't like Slumdog Millionaire at all. He told THE FUTURIST! that he truly dislikes it and wishes it was not the odds on favorite to win Best Picture at the 2008 Academy Awards ceremony. THE FUTURIST! hasn't seen it and doesn't really want to; he has no desire at all. It looks predictable and flashy and hokey and Blah! THE FUTURIST!, also, dislikes the fact that it is so destined to win. He likes surprises and horse races at award shows. Probably, though, the thing he fears the most about the Oscar Show is not this "feel good" flick winning everything hands down ... no ... what he fears is the moment Jerry Lewis takes the stage after he receives the JEAN HERSHOLT HUMANITARIAN AWARD. Yikes!!

Anywho ...

haiku told THE FUTURIST! that Slumdog Millionaire will win Best Score and Best Original Song, too. He said the song JAI-HO will win over the other Slumdog song and the song from WALL-E, which is the film haiku has petitioned The Library of Congress for national safekeeping in their preservation vaults. He has even called his Congressman regarding this request.

THE FUTURIST! has not heard this song called JAI-HO, but today THE FUTURIST! asks this:

What is JAI-HO? Is it like playing Jai-alai, but with a prostitute?

And, if so, is touching off bounds? And according to Wikipedia, a team scores a point if an opposing player:

* fails to catch the ball(s) on the "fly" or after one bounce

* holds or juggles the ball(s)

* hurls the ball(s) out of bounds

* interferes with a player attempting to hurl or catch the ball(s)

JAI-HO rules are making THE FUTURIST! cross his legs and wince!

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