Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Bale-listic


THE FUTURIST! has always wondered why Christian Bale is considered a good actor. He was quite good as a young boy in Stephen Spielberg's Empire of the Sun; his performance emotionally moved THE FUTURIST!. As an adult thespian, though, Bale has annoyed THE FUTURIST! to no end; his posturing, his brooding "acting" demeanor, his incomprehensible vocalizations in 3:10 to Yuma and those very important serious brooding Batman movies ... oh boy. He grumbles and mumbles and barely gets out his nouns and adjectives and constantly tries to disguise that English accent. He is, in THE FUTURIST!'s opinion, this close (THE FUTURIST! is holding his index finger very near to thumb) to being like that cold wooden Tom Cruise. However, Cruise can talk, Bale can't. Oh, but wait!! He can yell ... especially at a poor Director of Photography on his new Terminator Salvation movie (THE FUTURIST! can't wait for that spectacular cinematic two hours!) Bale can enunciate the "F" word perfectly, has the power to express utter rage and totally demean and threaten a man's job. This is not acting, however .. this is real life. Mr. Bale even attempts to physically attack the cinematographer. And we all thought he would never have attacked his Mother and sister during that Dark Knight junket, as was reported! No ... never! Perish the thought. THE FUTURIST! asks you to listen to the Ballistic Bale. Christian seems to be his name, but not his way of dealing with human relationships.

3 comments:

kazu said...

I wish I could watch him do this in his Batman outfit. What an ass.

THE FUTURIST! said...

God help Alfred, the butler, if he forgets to pick up the dry cleaning for Mr. Wayne. "YOU FUCKING ENGLISH PRICK!! Oh, my.

kazu said...

Did you see Michael Cera's impersonation?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D0KW4ESrZu0&feature=featured