Saturday, August 29, 2009

Saturday Music pour les Petit Boudins

A little French retro music from the 1960s is on slate for this weekend. THE FUTURIST! likes the look of this music video. He likes the white open set with the figures parading in and gyrating to the beat in their skirts and their bobbing hair. Oh, so happy and bouncy. And what about that 60s leisure suit garb on the singer! He seems very cool. And the title? Oh, according to a French speaking friend of THE FUTURIST!, a "bourdin" is French slang for a not so pretty girl who is never asked to dance at a party. Really? Who cares! Dance, Girls! DANCE!!

performed by Dominique Walter

Friday, August 28, 2009

Crime Stopping from Japan and Seagal

Wow. Doesn't this shot
of Joe Shishido and partner from
A COLT IS MY PASSPORT look really good?
(kind of like the poster for Hickey & Boggs -1972)


Doesn't this look so bad ...
that it's going to be really good?
(This is going to be a REAL show. No joke)

Woody and Hope

A rare find! Recently unearthed while cleaning out The Seussonoras Time Tunnel Garage (patent pending) ... THE FUTURIST! presents to you The Tonight Show from 1971 with guest host Woody Allen. This was interesting to watch since the main guest was a comedy inspiration for Woody ... namely Bob Hope. Woody attributes most of his earlier film characters' attitudes and comic delivery as being influenced by Hope's style. If you have the time and patience, watch these selections. You'll get to see Woody laugh quite a bit (a rarity), question one of his comedy idols, conduct an interview with a somewhat annoying James Coco, and do commercial lead-ins for Kellogg's Corn Flakes and Reynolds Aluminum Wrap.

Thursday, August 27, 2009


What if Hitler's hopes were dashed regarding James Cameron's upcoming
AVATAR film and he were able to express his disappointment to his closest aides?

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Bad Movies that Can Be Loved

On August 16th The Egyptian Theater in Los Angeles showed a reported pristine print of a film that was reviled by critics in 1973. The film is Lost Horizon, a musical version of the James Hilton novel that was filmed once before in 1937 by Frank Capra, but at that time, it was done as a straight drama. Hollywood producer Ross Hunter had the grand idea of taking the story and adding an entire musical score to sing and dance to ... and he chose actors who were not known to sing and/or dance. Peter Finch, Liv Ullman, George Kennedy, Michael York, John Gielgud and Sally Kellerman were the principal actors and the sole song and dance veteran was Bobby Van (featured once in an earlier post). Mr. Hunter wanted a lush romantic Broadway type of score, but the studio was wary due to the fact that the musical motion picture was nearing extinction and would cost a fortune to mount a production. The studio suggested that the score be hipper and more pop-ish to entice a new audience. They selected Burt Bacharach and Hal David to write the score. The movie did cost a fortune and was highly anticipated ... and then it crashed and burst into flames much like the plane that strands the passengers in the Tibetan mountains outside of Shangri-La in the original story.

Below you will find a video that an audience member took during the August 16th showing at The Egyptian. The section of the film shown is of Olivia Hussey and Sally Kellerman each expressing their desire to lead the other's life. Olivia wishing to live in the modern outside world and Sally wanting to stay in Shangri-La. The song is The List of the Things I Will Not Miss. You will see evidence of the production's mis-steps in casting and odd choreography. Keep your eyes peeled for the clumsy footwork, the cute point of view to audience head shots that were quaint in old MGM musicals, and the climb up the library shelf ladder.

What THE FUTURIST! loves about this video is the laughter and joy exuded by the theater audience. They are reveling in the pure unintended camp of the film. THE FUTURIST! read that the film was enjoyed thoroughly by the packed audience and was applauded at its finale. Interesting. They loved this failed film. And truth be told THE FUTURIST! has heard the soundtrack and doesn't think all the music is that bad ... but the voices singing? ouch (!) .... oh, if only THE FUTURIST! could have been there with friends to see this! A Burt Bacharach oddity on that massive screen with all that audience mojo going on! Movies can provide strange magic for the soul. That's what THE FUTURIST! calls Shangri-La!

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Saturday Music to Sing Under an Umbrella

A tropical burst of rain erupted this Saturday in Utter Despair. It has been hot, humid and disgusting. It feels like a steam pipe burst open and has been directed right at your body; within minutes you are drenched in perspiration. Of course, with the dog days of August one must expect sudden rain storms with or without thunder and lightning. This Saturday, let us listen to the music of Irving Berlin and the voice and fantastic footwork of Fred Astaire from Top Hat ... it might perk you up on this dreary day. (Top Hat is one of THE FUTURIST!'s top 10 favorite films!)


from the film TOP HAT (1935)
performed by Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers

Friday, August 21, 2009

Tarantino Hails a Taxi

Today THE FUTURIST! ends his week of Tarantino's epic verbal praising of some of his favorite films. The film he salutes in this post is Taxi Driver. He calls it the best movie of the 70s. This is a double video post, due to the fact that the first video cuts off suddenly ... and the second video is the conclusion with a rumored story about Scorsese and his thoughts of murdering a film executive due to the studio wanting to cut his film.

It was exciting to watch Mr. Tarantino expound on certain cinematic delights he relishes. THE FUTURIST!, as he watched these little verbal dissertations, thought of the excitement a food fetishist would have with a grand banquet. Tarantino gets into an orgasmic-like lather over cinema ... he cuts his arms through the air around him like cutlery and almost needs a lobster bib to catch the drippings from his voracious movie love drooling. "Ah, yes ... I'll have that Scorsese Salad, a bit of that DePalma Split Screen Soup, some Altman soft focus cheese, a slice of Bava Devil's Food Cake with that really really red cherry sauce, oh .. and two of those MacGuffins! yes! A blueberry and a cranberry MacGuffin! ... and some Blaxploitation pudding and Superfly Pie! Some Linguine a la Leone ... Dessert? Oh, an Italian Morricone with a glass of red Argento. Oh, dear God, I'm famished!"


Thursday, August 20, 2009

Tarantino Drinks an Anderson Milkshake

Today Quentin Tarantino speaks about Paul Thomas Anderson's There Will Be Blood. He is quite eloquent on the film's status as a masterpiece (though he thinks PTA's Boogie Nights is the real masterpiece) and his words on Daniel Day-Lewis' performance match exactly what THE FUTURIST! thinks on this iconic bit of cinematic acting; there is no performance in recent memory, in films, that can equal that of Day-Lewis' Daniel Plainview. Mr Tarantino says you should see this movie twice to be able to even talk about it ... THE FUTURIST! saw it only once (so far) and left the auditorium speechless ... totally in awe at the achievement in film making and acting. Please watch this 9 min video and hopefully, if you haven't seen it, it will inspire you to see a true masterpiece of modern film.

Some people say Paul Thomas Anderson has made films in the style of Scorsese (Boogie Nights), Altman (Magnolia) and Kubrick/Malick (There will Be Blood), but THE FUTURIST! sees them as true original films. In the case of Quentin Tarantino, who speaks of his "friendly rival" relationship with Anderson in this video, THE FUTURIST! sees Tarantino as imitating other movies in his movies in a blatant manner ... whole sequences, shots, sound effects, visual puns, and not even using original music. He constantly takes film music from other sources, mostly Ennio Morricone. His new film is titled the same as a film from the 70s only with mis-spelling ... it is not a remake at all. Tarantino's passion for the films he loves is morphed into his own films. THE FUTURIST! sees a great difference in the two filmmakers.

P.S. Yesterday's See You Next Wednesday! trailer was in keeping with the Tarantino flavor this week. It is referenced in the Kill Bill films. For instance: did you hear that siren-like musical cue when the kung fu hero out stretches his death dealing hands? Yup ... you heard it in Tarantino's movies. It's actually from an old TV show called Ironside.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

McCabe & Mrs. Miller & Tarantino

Here is Mr. Tarantino on Robert Altman's revisionist western. THE FUTURIST! loves Mr. Tarantino's frequent affected way of speaking ... is it real or a way of appearing very important in a vocal manner? If one doesn't agree with everything he says about the film, he is right on about the ending. And THE FUTURIST! thinks Robert Altman was a genius no matter what Tarantino says!

Monday, August 17, 2009

4 Days with Quentin Tarantino

THE FUTURIST! devotes today through Friday (minus Wednesday for the regular See You Next Wednesday! trailer feature) to film director Quentin Tarantino. This Friday will be the American premiere of his latest film Inglourious Basterds. Mr. Tarantino hosted a festival of movies he admires on Sky Movies Indie on August 14 -16. THE FUTURIST! will feature several of these introductions to the movies each day for your entertainment. Mr. Tarantino showed great brilliance once, in THE FUTURIST!'s humble opinion, but seems to have squandered it a bit in his choices in what he has created for the screen; he seems to have become a parody of his own style. His habit of having characters talk and talk and talk and then have punctuations of visual violence seem to get longer and longer and seem obvious and uncomfortable ... case in point, his last film Death Proof. The last few ventures seem like vulgar Eric Rohmer movies with breaking bones, samurai swords and high speed cars. One thing THE FUTURIST! likes, though, is when Mr. Tarantino talks. He loves loves loves movies and his passion is so evident and contagious. You may not agree with everything he chooses or says, but his rapid fire patter is hypnotizing and he invites you to engage your own passions for that white screen in the dark depicting dreams brought to life by moving light.

The first video is Mr. Tarantino listing his favorites films of the last 17 years ... this is since he made his first film in 1992. THE FUTURIST! has not seen many of the films he lists, but one film is an amazing pick ... Anything Else directed by Woody Allen. This is the film by Woody that THE FUTURIST! himself believes is Woody's last great film. It blows quirky indie cliche rom-com piffle (that aspires to be cynical Woody-esque love story material) like (500) Days of Summer out of the water.

A salute is performed (but not in a Fascist manner) in honor of The Amazing Mike Frollo for bringing this Tarantino material to THE FUTURIST!'s attention.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Saturday Music for the Dirty Hippies

In honor of the 40th anniversary of the Woodstock Concert, THE FUTURIST! is posting some revolutionary music from that generation. This tune is being presented with a video supplied by Solomon Whootiz, a member of the band Marcel Proust's Mustache. Solomon wanted to relive the Woodstock experience but was afraid to drop acid or shoot any chemicals into his body. Solomon pondered this for a few minutes and conferred with haiku and the other members of the band. THE FUTURIST! suggested that he have a martini or two and allow someone to hit him on the side of his head with a piece of sheet rock. Solomon agreed. Below you will see Solomon's view from the ground as he laid on his back in his backyard in the neighboring town of Ennui, NJ. The Seussonoras Labs cerebral time magnifier was attached to his head and then wired to a video camera and then placed in his hands. It fits perfectly with the song. As an added treat haiku poured water and mud on him and screamed occasionally. Young Sun Compton, obessed graphic designer and creator of THE FUTURIST!'s logo, wanted to add an accompanying font to the video, but was denied, as was the hash at lunch that day ... oh, not hash as in hashish ... no ... hash as in food. The corned beef had an odd odor.

performed by Thunderclap Newman

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Saturday Music in a Jittery Sci-Fi Manner

Strange things come our way. In recent history, THE FUTURIST! was led down the path of quirk and bizarre to discover this song and these skinny be-sweatered musicians called TO MY BOY. Here they are in a setting that resembles either a Stanley Kubrick film set or the test wind tunnel of Seussonoras Labs. Take some Dramamine with your gin and tonic before viewing; they hop and bounce and induce dizziness in their spastic possibly neuro-damaged performance. Here's a tip of the hat that THE FUTURIST! never wears to Simon Abrams for his recommendation of this musical duo.

performed by To My Boy

Monday, August 3, 2009

Rancho Libido

"Tucson, if THE FUTURIST! returns this week,
I'll first have sex with you and then Garret ...
if he doesn't come back this week,
I'll first have sex with Garret and then you.
If he's late and doesn't arrive until next week,
well, I'll have sex with myself ...
which should prove to be much more enjoyable than
with either of you two dullards."

"Boys, if that there FUTURIST! fella rides into town soon,
I'll saddle each one of ya up and have my way with ya!
You're first, Slick! You think you're saddle sore now,
from riding across county, well, fella, you just wait! Yup!"

"If THE FUTURIST! makes his presence known
in these parts by week's end, I, Judge Mason T. MacIntire,
will have immensely satisfying carnal knowledge with my moustache!!"

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Being Missed by Van Der Beek

James Van Der Beek is very distressed
over the fact that THE FUTURIST!
has not been posting more entries on this blog.
THE FUTURIST! apologizes to him and all others
that may have visited only to find
"scheduled" postings of regular features.
THE FUTURIST! has been preoccupied
and away from Utter Despair,
but still in utter despair.
He promises to get his sh*t together.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Saturday Music to Swing, Baby

Today feels like a Burt Bacharach Day. In honor of this inexplicable feeling, THE FUTURIST! posts this Saturday Music entry ... the theme song from the film of the same name Promise Her Anything; sung with 60s gusto and bravado by the iconic Tom Jones.



performed by Tom Jones